FAQ Alt Troll<\/p>\n
Cappy-Bob Hamper
\nJan 16 1999, 3:00 am show options
\nNewsgroups: alt.troll
\nFrom: C…@Cuba.net (Cappy-Bob Hamper) – Find messages by this author
\nDate: 1999\/01\/16
\nSubject: The alt.troll FAQ!!
\nReply to Author | Forward | Print | View Thread | Show original | Report Abuse
\nI have thrown together a rough draft just for fun. Take a look at it
\nand add\/subtract\/suggest…
\nTell me what you think…..
\n———————————————————————-
\nWelcome to Frequently Asked Questions about Alt.Troll
\n———————————————————————
\nThis document is designed to answer the frequently asked questions
\nabout Usenet trolls, trolling and the alt.troll newsgroup. This FAQ
\nwas created for information only, and how you use it entirely up to
\nyou. The existence of this document is in no way intended the grant
\nlicense or permission to violate your news providers Terms of Service
\n(TOS) rules or indicate the acceptability of anything described
\nherein. Be sensible.
\nIf you are taking the time to read this FAQ, you:
\na.) Want to find out more about trolls and trolling
\nb.) You are morbidly curious. Car wrecks also fascinate you.
\nIf you cruised into cyberspace today and forgot your sense of humor at
\nhome, please turn around and go get it. You’ll need it while reading
\nthis document, as it is intended as parody.
\nCopyright (c) 1999 by Cappy Hamper
\n————————–
\nThe following persons have contributed to this document at some point
\nin its evolution:
\nJB, O, BJ, DH, Dwtv, etc. (contibutors will be credited)
\nThe following persons have had been unwittingly plagiarized:
\nChuck Harrington
\nThis document was written by Cappy Hamper (Cappy_Ham…@hotmail.com),
\nwith contributions from my cat, and somebody else at some point. It
\nis copyrighted. The copyright is to prevent anyone from editing or
\nselling this material. Feel free to redistribute it in any form as
\nlong as it is unaltered in content and no credit or money is taken for
\nthe contents themselves. Comments, questions, contributions or ideas
\nshould be mailed to the email address above or posted to alt.troll.
\n—————-
\nCONTENTS
\n—————-
\nPart 1: TROLL? I THOUGHT THAT WAS ONLY IN FAIRY TALES.
\n1a) What is trolling?
\n1b) What is a troll?
\n1c) Why do trolls troll?
\n1d) When is a troll not a troll?
\n1e) Who are the trolls on real life?
\n1f) Trolls suck.
\nPart 2: WHAT ARE SOME EXAMPLES OF TROLLS? I STILL DON’T GET IT.
\n2a) The STRAIGHT UP ASSHOLE FLAME TROLL
\n2b) The CLUELESS NEWBIE JOKE TROLL
\n2c) The HIT, RUN AND WATCH TROLL
\n2d) The CONFIDENCE or TACTICAL TROLL
\n2e) The CREATIVE CROSS POST TROLL
\n2f) The GANG TROLL
\nPart 3: SHOULD I GO OUT AND START POSTING NOW? I’M A BADASS TROLL!
\n3a) So trolling is OK then?
\n3b) Is any newsgroup a potential target?
\n3c) What are the penalties for trolling?
\n3d) What is a TOS agreement?
\n3e) What is a netcop?
\nPart 4: HOW DO I HIDE MY IDENTITY? I WANNA BE A COVERT TROLL!
\n4a) How can I post anonymously?
\n4b) What news reader should I use?
\n4c) What news server should I use?
\n4e) What if I get TOSed?
\nPart 5: HOW TO DEFEAT TROLLS
\n5a) What about anti-troll sprays and powders?
\n5b) Should I compliment a troll?
\n5c) How do I get trolls out of my kitchen?
\n5d) Can I get my panties unbunched?
\nPart 6: About the alt.troll FAQ
\n—————
\nPART ONE
\n—————
\nTROLL? I THOUGHT THAT WAS ONLY IN FAERIE TALES.
\n1a) What is trolling?
\nThe use of the word “trolling” comes from the fishing technique where
\na baited hook is dragged through the water, in an attempt to attract
\nand catch a fish. Usenet trolling is the act of posting an article, or
\n“troll” (baited hook) in a Usenet newsgroup (the water) with the
\nintention of attracting the native inhabitants (groupers) and
\nprovoking an emotional response (caught!). The phrase was originally
\ncoined as “Trolling for flames”, where the posters intention was to
\nincite a “flame war”, the Usenet intellectual equivalent of a bar
\nfight.
\n1b) What is a troll?
\nIt is convenient that the word “troll” has multiple meanings. Aside
\nfrom the fishing example above, “troll” also is the name of a mythical
\ncreature, generally thought of as ugly, fat, cantankerous,
\nwart-covered, smelly, and completely unlikable. Since trolling is
\ntypically thought of as a detestable and unsavory activity performed
\nby loathsome, contemptible hooligans, the name “troll” fits them quite
\nwell.
\n1c) Why do trolls troll?
\nThere are as many reasons as there are trolls. Many trolls are just
\npractical jokers attempting to amuse themselves and their audience.
\nSome have genuine animosity toward a particular group or individual
\nthat they believe has done them wrong. Some are just loathsome,
\ncontemptible hooligans bent on disrupting the ordinarily peaceful
\nexchange of useful information for their own perverted pleasure.
\nUsenet provides a medium to create and express oneself, and gives the
\nadded dimension of anonymity, allowing the troll to create and express
\nemotions, thoughts and ideas that he\/she might not ordinarily express.
\nFor many, Usenet is the first and only place their creative works will
\never be “published”. Trolling, for many, is a creative endeavor, an
\nart form if you will, misunderstood by many, appreciated by a few, but
\nvalid to the writer none-the-less.
\n1d) When is a troll not a troll?
\nIf trolling is performed for any reason other than for an artful form
\nof expression or harmless amusement, it is a crime and the criminal
\nshould be punished accordingly. Trolling is not about tricking senior
\ncitizens or lonely spinsters out of their nest eggs, making dates with
\nteenage girls, verbally abusing or otherwise hurting anyone, or
\nbringing about the end of Usenet. If you are an asshole, sociopath,
\ndisgruntled postal worker, on a power trip, or are unusually cruel,
\nget some therapy or a house pet. Trolling is not for you.
\n1e) Who are the trolls in real life?
\nDoctors, lawyers, clergymen, truck drivers, real estate agents,
\ncollege students, university, professors, mechanics, politicians,
\ncircus clowns, professional mercenaries, cowboys, eccentric
\nbillionaire software tycoons, warehousemen, movie stars, hit men,
\nlandscapers, authors, policemen, tax collectors, TV news anchors,
\nsports figures, farmers…er, well, some of them have jobs doing
\nsomething.
\n1f) Trolls suck! Get a life you loser. Stop posting your smelly crap
\nall over my Usenet!
\nI’m sorry, this is a FAQ. You’ll have to rephrase that in the form of
\na question.
\n—————-
\nPART TWO
\n—————-
\nWHAT ARE SOME EXAMPLES OF TROLLS? I STILL DON’T GET IT.
\nThe following is a list of common troll styles. This list should not
\nbe considered exhaustive, as there is not way to predict what those
\npesky little trolls will come up with next. However, here are some
\ntypical and widely used forms, the names of which have been coined by
\nthe author:
\n2a) The STRAIGHT UP ASSHOLE FLAME TROLL- Easy. The troll will post a
\nmessage with a very inflammatory header that will guarantee furious
\nreplies. An example would be a post in ALT.SKINHEADS with the header,
\n“YOU BUNCHA RACIST ASSWIPERS EAT DOG CRAP BISQUITS!” The body might be
\na single sentence like “There’s a revolution coming and we’re gonna
\ngang-rape all your zit-covered skinhead women, you cowardly redneck
\nassholes!” Bubba and all his friends down at the gun shop will be
\nmore than happy to attempt to out-vulgarize the troll, and the troll
\nwill gleefully reply until the thread takes on a life of it’s own.
\n2b) The CLUELESS NEWBIE JOKE TROLL- The troll will either post a new
\nmessage or follow up on a previous thread with a funny, usually
\nblatantly incorrect or ironic header, and a witty or outrageously
\nstupid body. An example would be a post in ALT.SATAN with the header
\n“CAN ANYONE PLEASE TELL ME HOW MANY OUNCES ARE IN A PENTAGRAM?” This
\nmay not get any replies, but the joke has been made. The troll can
\nchuckle to him\/herself for hours.
\n2c) The HIT, RUN AND WATCH TROLL- The troll will drop a single post
\nwith a disagreeable header and creative content, then sit back and
\nwatch the thread run it’s course. An example would be a message in
\nREC.PETS.CATS with the header, “CATS SUCK DOGS BUTTS AND SO DO THEIR
\nOWNERS”, filled in with a few lines about why dogs are better than
\ncats. The thread will erupt with indignant cries of “bigot” and “not
\nmy kitty!” followed by follow-ups of the wiser groupers telling
\neveryone not to respond to trolls, then disagreements between the
\nmembers…etc. A variation is to add a little creativity to the same
\nidea, such as the header, “HOW DO I KEEP MY DOG FROM CHASING CATS?”
\nThen fill in the body with a few lines graphically describing how your
\ndog often comes home with lifeless kitties in his mouth. Or better
\nyet, post a “RECIPE FOR CHINESE FELINE FOO YUNG.” This can die
\nimmediately or go on forever.
\n2d) The CONFIDENCE or TACTICAL TROLL- The troll will begin by posting
\na few messages in a given NG that are on-topic, if not slightly
\nover-the-top. Methodically, the troll will begin writing the messages
\nto be a little more sarcastic, silly, or even more over-the-top than
\nthe last one, until the group finally catches on that the poster is a
\ntroll. By that time the troll has had plenty of fun, and can go on
\nhis\/her way to the next group. An example would be a message in the
\nalt.alien.visitors NG with an initial post, “HOW DO I KNOW IF I’VE
\nBEEN ABDUCTED?” The troll would ask believable questions and seem
\nlegit at first. As groupers began to reply, the troll would add to the
\nstory line and let it develop into a full scale story of an abduction,
\nsexual probing, missing time, mutilated farm animals, aluminum foil
\nhats, and ongoing communications where the aliens have announced that
\nthey are coming to land the mother ship in Las Vegas and turn it into
\na casino\/theme park. Here is where the frustrated writer\/troll does
\nhis work, and is often the most entertaining thread to follow if you
\nare a troll fan.
\n2e) The CREATIVE CROSS POST TROLL- The troll will select two or more
\nNG’s where the groupers are already against each other, and start a
\nfight between them. An actual example was the message cross-posted in
\nalt.fan.howard-stern and alt.fan.rush-limbaugh, “HOWARD STERN KICKS
\nRUSH LIMBAUGHS ASS!” The body explained in some detail why Howard is
\nbetter than Rush. This is not a troll to the Howard groupers, but
\ndefinitely is to the Ditto Heads. The Rush groupers took offense,
\nblasted out several replies, the Howard fans replied, and a war broke
\nout between the two groups that continues to the day of this writing.
\nOf course, a few trolls jumped in and fanned the flames occasionally.
\nThe two groups didn’t realize (or didn’t care) that every message was
\ncross-posted to both groups, so in effect they were tolling
\nthemselves. Brilliant.
\n2f) The GANG TROLL- A single troll will invite others to join a
\nsuccessful thread, or a group of trolls will agree to launch a
\nsimultaneous attack on a pre-determined target NG. Coordination is
\ndone by e-mail, on the home newsgroup (alt.troll), ICQ, or some other
\nmethod of communication. The trolls may choose to argue opposite sides
\nof the issue, half pretending to be groupers who are over-the-top and
\nfight back against the evil trolls, or all just blast away at the
\nregulars. An individual may also be the target, in which case the
\ntrolling may cross NG borders. The gang troll can be performed in
\ntandem with any of the other trolling types to completely befuddle the
\nNG. This can be done for a few days, stopping as suddenly as it
\nstarted, or go on until the group (or individual) self-destructs.
\n——————-
\nPART THREE
\n——————-
\nSHOULD I GO OUT AND START POSTING NOW? I’M A BADASS TROLL!
\n3a) So trolling is OK then?
\nNo! Trolling is offensive and rude. It upsets and even infuriates
\npeople and makes them yell and spit and stomp around in their offices
\nand computer rooms. You may be responsible for giving someone a stroke
\nor a brain hemorrhage. Trolling is definitely frowned upon by your ISP
\nand\/or news provider. The only ones who think trolling is funny are
\nthe trolls. So unless you’re a troll, trolling is not funny. Remember
\nthat. Do not laugh at trolls. They suck.
\n3a) Is any NG a troll target?
\nTechnically, yes. However, the wise troll knows how to choose his\/her
\nbattles. Most trolls prefer to stick with the more arcane and\/or
\nsocially stunted groups. Likely targets may be groups dedicated to any
\nrock star, movie star, TV star, make of car, house pet or other
\nanimal, obscure religions, radicals, hate groups of any kind, nuke
\n(anything), cartoons, drugs, alcohol, stupid collecting activities and
\nthe like. Some of the more genteel trolls may advocate avoiding groups
\nengaged in genuinely academic, mainstream religious, warez related, or
\notherwise non-frivolous discussions. There are plenty of the former to
\nkeep even the most industrious troll busy for a thousand years.
\n3c) What are the penalties for trolling?
\nYou cannot be fined, jailed, or permanently separated from your
\ncomputer. You will not get your fingers broken by Bill Gates. You will
\nnot be killed and eaten by netcops. What will happen is that the
\ngroupers will yell and scream. They may follow you around and troll
\nyou back. They may threaten to get you TOS’ed (have your account
\nsuspended), and can successfully do so if you have not hidden your
\nidentity. However, there are approximately 4.7 trillion ISPs in every
\nmetropolitan area. You can simply open a new account. In addition,
\ngetting caught trolling from your company’s computer network will
\nlikely result in your immediate dismissal. (More time for trolling!
\nYeee Haw!)
\n3d) What is a TOS agreement?
\nThe Terms of Service, or TOS agreement is the list of rules that ISP’s
\nand news servers provide to users. Generally, the agreement will
\ndirectly or indirectly warn against trolling, referred to as
\nintentionally disrupting, threatening, flooding, or spamming on
\nUsenet. If a user is caught trolling, his\/her account may be
\nsuspended. This is referred to as getting “TOSed”.
\n3e) What is a Netcop?
\nA “Netcop” is a Usenet vigilante. A newsgroup hall monitor. They
\ncruise the streets and alleys of Usenet in search of bad guys. Their
\ngoal is to stop to trolling and other types of free expression, and to
\nsend Usenet into a fit of blandness.
\n(In reality, they are figments of their own imaginations. A properly
\neducated troll in the correct state of mind does not fear these rabid
\nguard dogs. Their bark smells of cat crap and the only bite they have
\nis that of the fleas on their hairy butts. CH)
\n—————–
\nPART FOUR
\n—————–
\nHOW DO I HIDE MY IDENTITY? I WANNA BE A COVERT TROLL!
\n4a) How can I post anonymously?
\nIt is common for groupers to use false identities, or “Nyms”, when
\nposting messages. This is especially important if the nature of the
\nmessage implicates the author to any wrongdoing. But even if you use a
\nnickname, your newsreader and ISP post enough information in the
\nheaders of every post to easily attract an abuse complaint to your
\nISP. However, it is possible to post messages in such a way that it is
\npractically impossible to trace the message back to you or your news
\nservice. Trolls do this to avoid getting TOS’ed. This section will
\ncover a few possible methods. Remember, none of these is foolproof and
\nunder no circumstances should you try any of this, as it may be a
\nviolation of your TOS agreement.
\nHacking the headers in Forte’ Agent: This is the best method since you
\ncan change your name (nym-shift) and other fields at will. Properly
\nhacked headers will not only protect your identity, but if
\nappropriately worded, can add fun to the troll. The header hacking
\nprograms will add space and change headers in full versions of Agent.
\nGo to http:\/\/www.skuz.net\/madhat\/agent\/patch.html for downloads and
\ninstructions. You can change the domain name, your posting name, your
\nemail address, and the Path and the NNTP Posting Host entries. It will
\nalso add a few extra “vanity” X-headers so you can customize and add
\namusing text. THIS DOES NOT WORK WITH ALL ISP’S! Some providers
\noverride the attempt to cover your tracks. Always post a message to
\nalt.test and look at all the headers (type “H”) to see what is still
\nshowing. There should not be any reference to your ISP’s domain name
\nor IP address anywhere other than the inbound section of the path.
\nAlways save a backup of your agent.exe file before hacking!
\nDejanews: http:\/\/www.dejanews.com Dejanews is an Internet based news
\nprovider. You can read and post to all non-binary newsgroups through
\nyour web browser. Dejanews requires a mail-back verification before
\nyou can post. Go to http:\/\/www.hotmail.com and set up a mailbox. When
\nyou set up your account with Dejanews, use the hotmail account to
\nregister with. Then post away! It is possible to have several accounts
\nactive at once. If you get TOSed on one, set up two more. This method
\nis not completely anonymous. Since the IP address of origin is posted
\nin the headers, you could be traced back to you ISP. However, unless
\nyou’re dangerous or really make someone mad, no one will go to the
\ntrouble.
\nAnonymous Remailers: There are several free anonymous mail2news
\nprograms and services as of this writing. They’re great if you want to
\npost the all the secret launch codes for the American nuclear arsenal
\nto alt.nuke.usa without any fear of being caught. Mostly they are a
\nhassle. These links will take you to sites with excellent information:
\nhttp:\/\/www.dnai.com\/~wussery\/news3nym.html
\nhttp:\/\/www.skuz.net\/Thanatop\/intro.htm
\n4b) What news reader should I use?
\nForte’ Agent is preferred by most everyone as the best all-around
\nnewsreader. The freeware version can be downloaded at
\nhttp:\/\/www.forteinc.com. Upgrade to the full version right away. You
\nshould pay for it, because the good folks at Forte’ worked hard to
\nproduce an excellent product. Do not find one of the key generators on
\nthe internet and crack it for free.
\n4c) What news server should I use?
\nIf you use a premium news server, like Newscene
\nhttp:\/\/www.newscene.com or Airnews http:\/\/www.airnews.net, you will
\nhave full access to all newsgroups, near perfect propagation when you
\npost, and complete posts for all your binary file downloading needs.
\nIn addition, most premium news providers do not add or override to
\nyour headers, making the header hacking procedure above work
\nperfectly. They do cost around $10.00\/month, but worth it.
\n4e) What if I get TOSed?
\nDon’t. But if you do, get another account.
\n—————-
\nPART FIVE
\n—————-
\nHOW TO DEFEAT TROLLS
\nPart 5: HOW TO DEFEAT TROLLS
\n5a) What about anti-troll sprays and powders?
\nTry this: Spray a little Cruex around your CPU, monitor, and keyboard.
\nMake sure you lift up your mouse and give his undercarriage a good
\ndose. Sprinkle baking powder on your sheets and in your shoes. Gargle
\nwith four ounces of Isopropyl alcohol, DO NOT SWALLOW IT! Then
\ncollect and incinerate all of your undergarments and “personal
\nappliances”.
\n5b) Should I compliment a troll?
\nYes. Say, “My you look pretty today! Have you lost weight?” It drives
\nthem crazy.
\n5c) How do I get trolls out of my kitchen?
\nYou can’t. Buy extra food and throw an old towel in the corner for
\nbedding. If you try to make them leave, they’ll just get mad.
\n5d) Can I get my panties unbunched?
\nNot likely. Try some WD-40
\n————–
\nPART SIX
\n————–
\nABOUT THE ALT.TROLL FAQ
\nThis section is for people who want to know more about the
\nFAQ itself, and for those who want to be a part of
\nmaintaining and distributing this document. First we will
\nstart with a Version History of the alt.troll FAQ:
\n——————————–
\nVersion 0.1: This version. Revisions will be 0.2, 0.3, etc.
\nVersion 1.0: This will be the first full version when completed
\nVersion 1.x: This will be the mini FAQ for periodic posting to the
\nalt.troll NG.
\nFuture Versions: TBA<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
FAQ Alt Troll Cappy-Bob Hamper Jan 16 1999, 3:00 am show options Newsgroups: alt.troll From: C…@Cuba.net (Cappy-Bob Hamper) – Find messages by this author Date: 1999\/01\/16 Subject: The alt.troll FAQ!! Reply to Author | Forward | Print | View Thread | Show original | Report Abuse I have thrown together a rough draft just for<\/p>\n